Hello friends, I have good news. It’s a new year and a new Eric. New Year’s is not the best holiday. In fact, I’d argue it’s bottom tier. It gets overshadowed by Christmas. The day before is the real holiday. If it wasn’t for the Grand Daddy of them All, would it even be worth celebrating?
Stephen A Smith voice: However,
There is one thing that New Year’s has that the other five major bankies (slang for bank holiday) don’t have… hope. One time a banker (who didn’t shoot his wife) said, “Hope is a good thing.” and these are words I live by every day. Ok, probably not everyday, but I love the idea of hope that I can be a new, better, Eric that publishes more blogs and has a six pack. The problem that arises with hope is “When am I going to change my life around?” My birthday? Too close to the holidays. Summer? Too busy. Only time that works is the new year. It’s wonderful, the procrastinator’s holiday. Best part, if you fail, a new New Year is less than 12 months away.
I’ve been a big fan of setting goals and resolutions for a couple years now. I had three last year and completed two of them (go to therapy and quit my job, failed third will be referenced later, don’t worry). We’ve got a very exciting list for this year and am looking forward to going a whopping 8 for 8!
- Shave my head every week – My only measurable goal to give myself 52 haircuts seems easy enough. My hair/lack thereof/head looks best when it’s short, so we’re cutting it every Saturday morning, and I’m going to look hot.
- Mustache for the full year – To truly have a new year you need a new look. So we’re going stache only, no beard (until I have given up on the year).
- Lose 35 pounds so I look good with a mustache – It’s against the law not to have some sort of weight loss goal in your resolutions. Instead of having a normal weight loss goal like having the same body as a specific picture of 10 time NBA all-star (last year’s failed goal), we decided to put a fun twist on an old resolution. I have a slightly chubby face at the moment, and if I want a less chubby face, I’m going to have to lose weight. By having the mustache I’m holding myself accountable.
- Be a worse person – It’s a win-win. If I am a worse person, my goal is accomplished. If I’m a better person, I’ll have a positive impact on myself and those around me. Maybe I’ll make it into a t-shirt and make you wear it. Call that a win-win-win.
- Drink more water – The easiest, least measurable, goal of all time.
- Drink more coffee – If I drink more water, I should be able to add like 4 more oz. of coffee a day as well.
- One Blog a month – sadly we only had 2 blogs in the entire 2022 year, and that is unacceptable. My followers want more and deserve better. I’m the best writer I know, and if The New Yorker is ever going to call me up to the big leagues, I have to be practiced and ready. In order to be held accountable we’re going to have to bring back the @bteamballer NBA Finals one lucky follower accountability system.
- Stop giving to nonprofits – You want to make the world a better place? Get a blue collar job and pay for it yourself.
Here are three Nonprofits that I will not be supporting but you can feel free to.
https://www.mission-haiti.org/
Well folks, there we have it. New year, new mustached, worse person Eric. It’s going to take some time (1 year) and hard work, but I believe that together as a team we can get there.
bteamballer 